08 October 2006

Dear Mr. Moreau -


Congratulations! This letter is to inform you that you have won the first annual Hot-Off competition hosted by Hot Oil, a month-long battle to determine who the hottest Oiler is. Your victory was no small feat, considering the high overall level of hotness represented on the Edmonton Oilers roster.

In your first-round win against Igor Ulanov, you were established as an early favourite with the voter comment “Ethan looks like he could make you ovulate from across the room with one glance.” As the competition went on, Petr Sykora, Raffi Torres, Craig MacTavish, and finally Dwayne Roloson were also felled by our voters’ passion for your, er, “shorthanded goal record.”

Please find enclosed a “Certificate of Hotness” documenting your status as Hot Champion 2006, as well as a few tokens of our appreciation for your toothless smile.


The above letter and certificate were mailed to our Hot-Off champion Ethan Moreau yesterday, care of the Oilers, along with some "prizes." For your entertainment (or boredom, depending on how exciting you find colour printers), I have photo-documented the process by which our grand prize package was assembled and mailed:

Here's my printer at work. Way to go, little guy!

Here I am typing the letter. If this were Top Model, Janice Dickinson would say that my hand looks like a catcher's mitt.

The certificate goes into an envelope. I used cardboard to make sure the paper wouldn't get creased!

Look what I found in my medicine cabinet!

Here's the total package: letter in the white envelope; certificate in the yellow. In addition to the Hot Oil, our prizes include Hot Rod meat sticks and Hot Tamales candy. Nothing goes with processed meat like synthetic cinnamon flavour!

Here's my friendly neighborhood postal worker getting ready to ship our package off to the winner. Huzzah!

21 comments:

Scarlett said...

I hope you get a response. Actually, I hope Ethan gets this. Awesome job girls!!!

fleecefish said...

I'd love to see what Ethan has to say about this. Haha *applause*

Ryan said...

Godspeed, ladies.
I'm just glad MAB didn't win.

hockeygirl said...

Nice work, I agree with Scarlett, I hope he replies.

J.R. Hippe said...

You should have included the website somewhere so he could pass it along to teammates to check out his victory.

Alana said...

The website address was included in the letter, so if we start to see an "Ethana" ot "Ethanette" commenting around here I think we can assume that the package arrived safely.

amy said...

Hahaha you girls. I can't believe you actually sent that... I love it so much.

My heros <3

Pam (chopper) said...

Love it!

Great job ladies!

Great job to all the ladies as well that voted for Mr. Moreau!

Sherry said...

That is simply amazing. I think we'll have to be extra keen with the sports news now to see if there might be some after-effects of this :P

Jordi said...

I think a restraining order is coming shortly in the mail the other way. That and uh... I'm amazed.

the Prez said...

I saw Moreau tonight at O'Byrnes. It was very exciting for me to be in the same room with the Hot Off champ of '06!

D. said...

Love it. I really hope it gets it and replies. I would love to see the look on his face as he opens up the package. Good job. Thanks for the pictures.

cat said...

Haha! That's awesome. Good work, ladies. Make sure you post the response if you get it - even if it is a restraining order!

afterburner said...

That's awesome you guys - thanks for hosting the Hot-Off. It was a lot of fun, despite a few white knuckle moments when the polls were close, and it killed some quiet off-season hours. Thanks, ladies!

sammy said...

Now that is inspired stuff! Well done on sending it off and thanks for the fun of the hot off. I can't wait for next year!

Dominique said...

You used my ovulating comment! To think that Mr. Moreau may one day read my adoring and slightly creepy words! Squee!

I am also holding you all personally responsible for the entrance of the word "squee" into me and my roomates vocabularies.

Lowetide said...

The entire thing was top drawer. The contest, the voting, and now the quality manner the winner is being contacted.

Will this be an annual event?

Daggit said...

is that the number 55 I see on the vo5 box?

hmmm... prez? perhaps the hockey-hotness gods are trying to tell us all some terrible mistakes have been made?

Alana said...

Lowetide, I think that's the plan. Here's hoping Brodziak makes the team next year so Moreau has some competition!

amy said...

Couldn't we just send something to Brodziak over in Wilkes-Barre to let him know that we still love?

Sydthe Roli Lover(Squee)PS email me if you love Roli dwayne_roloson_fan35@hotmail.com said...

Of course I wish it was Roli(Squee) that was going to be creeped out by the internet fan hott-off thing(how weird do you think they think we all are?)I must say that ios pretty cool!!Did you send that to the fan mail address?